WARNING: THIS IS A RANT! If you think you may be offended, leave now!
I do the huge majority of Max’s night feeds in our house. If I’m lucky I can usually persuade J to do one at the weekend. Now normally I don’t mind this - after all he’s going out 5 days a week doing a job he really isn’t that keen on (although it is a desk job so not physically tiring in the slightest) to bring in the money etc, he’s up earlier to get to work, and *at the moment* the boys seem to have taken to sleeping til about 9am which is amazing, although I doubt it’ll last.
Thing is… the very IDEA that he do the night feeds on the friday AND the saturday night and apparently I’m being unfair. I don’t think that’s right as he is getting 6 nights a week of proper un-interrupted sleep (i have to thump him awake when he does do the night feed cause he sleeps thru the crying) while I’m living off about 4-5 hours of very broken sleep that whole time and having to run around after a toddler each day, keep up with the housework, and tidy up after said toddler, baby and husband. and to top it all when he actually does the night feed he needs a lie in and a nap to ‘catch up’. see where I’m going with this??
do you think i should stick to my guns and ask him to do the fri and sat night feeds on a regular basis? or am I being unfair? please don’t be too mean in your comment if ya think I’m being unfair or I’ll cry! 
Entries (RSS)
awwww…sorry..can’t hurt to ask
Sigh….I remember those days…It’ll get better soon!
andrena’s last blog post..Cotton Pickin’ Ciborium!
I don’t think you are being unfair in the slightest. He doesn’t have to work the morning afterwards, so he *should* help out.
However, knowing how men think, that is not the way he sees it. I couldn’t ask Nat to do any feeds for me, as Amy refused a bottle.
Veronica’s last blog post..Blogging Bedtime As It Happens.
I feel for you- getting up in the night takes so much out of you, and it’s hard when you can’t rest during the day. I went through this with my kids- I had a 15 months old and a two month old!
I don’t think you’re being unfair either, I think it’s reasonable that he should do the two nights for you. It would make a big difference to you to have a couple of nights good sleep.
I wish you good luck- I hope you can persuade him to give it a try!
But hang in there….these days will go so fast!
bella mocha’s last blog post..Turning Off the Lights…..
hmm..
well J should do one night round.. thats for sure..
and maybe one during week or something..
men are slack when it comes to this.. believe me..
good luck with it..
ok I feel reeeeeally bad now… I think he must’ve read this… he’s offered to do the night feed and give me a lie in tomorrow. *hangs head in shame*
If you can GET him to do ANY night feedings, go for it and don’t feel guilty! My husband hasn’t missed ONE SINGLE night’s sleep in almost 5 years/two kids. Take what you can get, lucky girl!
marlee’s last blog post..Part 2: How to Piss Your Wife Off at Dinnertime
I agree, it is unfair. My hubby did this with our two girls and I’m fully expecting it to happen with the new baby. It did bother me and it probably will bother me. You have every right to rant.
But if you can’t get him to help (as men just don’t seem to understand sometimes) here’s a few things I tried to remind myself of so that I wouldn’t end up resenting him forever for it.
*During that night feeding, it’s just me and my baby, alone, bonding, no interruptions, and she knows that WHENEVER she needs Mommy, I’m there, even at 3 a.m. Hopefully, when your older and you find yourself at that party your were told NOT to go to, and it’s 3 a.m. and you know you shouldn’t drive home, or ride home with the “friends” who took you there that you’ll remember that you can call out for mom and I’ll be there, WHENEVER.
*Unlike hubby, I DON’T have to get dressed, or put on a tie, or even brush my hair.
*The first opportunity to show my children that I can meet their needs will be missed by my hubby. He’ll have to do something else, find some other way to show them that he can provide for them. I’ve seen it in my hubby’s face, the disappointment when they repeatedly ask for me because “Daddy can’t do it”….
My girls are 6 and 3,and the eldest is just now sleeping through the night on a pretty regular basis. It’s been six years, and unless some wonderful grandparent lets them stay the night, I do NOT get more than 3-5 hours of sleep at a time. Sometimes, that all I get all night. I don’t think my hubby is wired to be able to do things while he’s sleeping. It’s not worth it to me to have to listen to all the fussing and whining the next day. I’ve surrendered and started to only ask for help when I really need it, like when I’m sick.
MommaTaderDoodles’s last blog post..Today’s Tweets!
I’d be livid if my husband tried that stunt. You didn’t have the baby on your own, he has responsibilities as a father and that includes the night-time.
Jeanette’s last blog post..Do we have enough security?
How did it go, did he do the night-feed?
Just saying hello and wondering how you’re doing…:)
bella mocha’s last blog post..Sunday Scribblings # 1 - ‘New’
well J did the night feed and I gave him a lie in - the boys slept til….wait for it… 9am! this was including Max’s feed at 4am though. I know he could sleep through if he’d just take a proper feed at night! *sigh*